My best friend

My best friend is someone that I have nothing in common with, someone that I shouldn't be attracted to, and someone I have a history with. A week history, but a history nonetheless.

Basically, I've loved him for years. His feelings haven't been as strong as mine, but he's had his moments where he's shared something similar. Or so I've been led to believe. I don't know for certain, all I can do is trust that he's telling me the truth. He's not the usual kind of guy that I'm attracted to, I generally like a guy with dark hair, pale skin, light eyes. He's tan, blonde, with light eyes. He's into sports, sky diving, snowboarding... I've never had the money for the last two - and I'm not really into sports. We would be terrible for each other.

But, I tell him everything, and I know he won't judge me... or leave. He's been there to support me through all of my ups and downs, and sides to sides. I'd like to think that I've been able to support him in the same ways. Being around him makes me a better person. It makes me a better mother. And honestly... I owe him an apology.

I'm sorry for all of the accusations that I pinned on you a few weeks back. You were withdrawing, yes - and for that portion I stand by what I said. But for everything else, I'm sorry. I was projecting my own insecurities about myself, my appearance, my love life... I was projecting all of my issues on you. I was projecting those issues and blaming you for looking at me that way, but in all reality I was upset with myself. My sincerest deepest apologies.

I didn't want to meet her, but I'm glad I did. Seeing you together helped me go a long way in getting over you. You don't look like that when you're with me. I want you to be happy.